The Errors of Jurassic World (2015)

As A.D. 2014 draws to a close, the busy little apes at Legendary Pictures are getting down and dirty with post processing of their latest adventure on Isla Nublar – a representation of the legacy of humanities greed. Steven Spielberg has consistently produced and directed the best films Hollywood has ever known for the passed three decades. Though when he plays with Science……well…….he does quite alright actually. Though there are some things that annoy me. Spielberg is now the executive producer of Jurassic World (2015) and the film is directed by Colin Trevorrow. On the 25th of November 2014, the above trailer was published on Youtube. Let us have a look at the dinosaurs that feature in it.

Steven_Spielberg_Masterclass_Cinémathèque_Française_2
Steven Spielberg……………….like you didn’t know.

We do not get a glimpse of the dinosaurs until 45 seconds in. A herd of Gallimius run alongside a safari truck. Then six, two person canoes paddling along a river, with three sauropods and two stegosaurids quenching their thirst along its bank. Some more sauropods and then a hold-your-breath moment arrives with the leaping of a Mosasaurid out of the water to snatch a dangling Great White Shark to a captivated audience. And you cannot have a Jurassic World without egg laboratory scenes. Things get dark when a bipedal dinosaur chases the main character. We get no view of the creature that will drive the chaos in the park, but we do get 4 dromaeosaurids acting like trained loyal dogs as the main character motorcycles through the park at night.

Mosasaurus_hoffmannii_-_skeleton
Mosasaurus hoffmannii – Natural History Museum of Maastricht, The Netherlands.

I will be looking forward to watching this movie next year. However, it appears to me that the main antagonist of the film will be a Tyrannosaurus rex only there will be something different about this rebooted dinosaur. The popularity of the Tyrannosaurus rex was what inspired this article and so I present to you the 3 things that Colin Trevorrow and crew will get all wrong in the latest edition of the ‘Park from Hell’.

1. Tyrannical Kings Get All The Publicity

Much debate continues regarding the Tyrannosaurids. The famous species of this genus was no more than 12 metres long by 4 metres high, 7 tons and its skin was partially covered in primitive feathers. It would have acted as a scavenger most of the time, but when the opportunity presented itself, it would hunt too. It was capable of running 11 miles per hour. Is that all? Pathetic!

Tyrannosaurus_rex_mmartyniuk

In light of the previous episodes of the Jurassic franchise, it is likely that the above science will be ignored in the new film. The premise of the new film hinges on a genetic reboot of the Tyrannosaurus. Coupled with the pigmentation metamorphosis character of a cuttlefish, this new terror would also have neurological capabilities beyond what we think it evolved over the mere two million years it existed, from 67 to 66 million years ago. It is frustrating that filmakers, continue to fixate on creatures that sells, neglecting the diversity of life that existed on our dear planet for around 150 million years. Ultimately, the story should not suffer as a result of the science, but you should make an effort with every new film to introduce a truly kickass creature. Leave the Tyrant King Lizard alone, it has suffered enough.

2. Velociraptorids

Velociraptorids were probably creatures you could not mess with. Chickens on steroids, they measured about 2 metres in length, 50 centimetres high and weighed about 15 kilograms. Its jaw contained around 27 serrated and spaced teeth and its body was covered in primitive feathers. This ancient chicken’s most famous feature was of course the 6 and a half centimetre second digit on its foot. This was probably used as a means of griping onto prey it leaped upon and some evidence suggests it could have been used to aid in the cutting open of prey.

Utahraptor_updated
Utahraptor ostrommaysorum Reconstruction – Now this is what I call a cool chicken!

In the closing sequence of the trailer, we see our hero motorcycle into Jurassic Park with four bipedal creatures that bare a striking resemblance to the Velociraptors of the previous episodes of the Jurassic franchise. If they are indeed labelled Velociraptor, it will be very unfortunate. I’m hoping that Trevorrow will introduce us all to another species of dromaeosaurid called Utahraptor ostrommaysorum that lived 126 million years ago. It was about 7 metres long, about 2 metres high, weighed about half a ton and had a 22 centimetre second digit on its foot. Now seeing that in action would be quite cool. It’s like haveing an ultra chicken as your sidekick.

The film is not even released and already, there are issues regarding prehistoric accuracy. DON’T LET US DOWN TREVORROW!

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1 thought on “The Errors of Jurassic World (2015)

  1. Pretty sure that’s a pliosaur(likely based on Predator X), not a mosasaur.

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